


flock together

by HorribleThing



Series: magic college AU [2]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Friendship, Theft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-08
Updated: 2016-09-08
Packaged: 2018-08-13 20:00:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7984300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HorribleThing/pseuds/HorribleThing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sloane and Taako have this game.</p><p>(A collection of stolen goods.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	flock together

**Author's Note:**

> This fic features background Sloane/Hurley, Taako/Avi, Taako/Klarg and Taako/Kravitz. (Damn, Taako!) That last one isn't featured 'on screen' so to speak, but it is important.
> 
> There's also a tiny bit of physical description in this, but please feel free to remove my headcanons and insert your own!

  1. Assorted gold, a paperweight.



No one else notices it.  They’re all distracted by the current drinking contest going on, chanting “CHUG!” over and over. As much as stuff like this annoys Sloane, it’s convenient and she’ll definitely take advantage of it.  So she’s the only one that sees Taako take a paperweight and slip it into his pocket.

She typically only grabs useful things.  Money.  Jewelry.  Small magical artifacts.  Sometimes tech, but that’s harder to pawn.  The trick is to take things that people will just think they lost.  To take a little but take from a lot of places.  But there’s always a point to it.  Is there really a point to a paperweight?  Besides the obvious?

“So,” she says to him at the end of the night while they’re walking back to the train with their friends in varying states of inebriation.  “What did you grab?”

He grins, not even looking the least bit sheepish, and fishes the paperweight out of his pocket, handing it to her.  “I just thought it was pretty,” he says.  And it is.  The smooth, round glass looks like the night sky filled with twinkling stars and as she watches she sees a tiny comet streak through.

Taako is kind of weird, but he’s okay.

 

  1.  Assorted gold, a fork, a knife, two spoons.



When it becomes clear that no one else is there, she follows him into the kitchen where he removes a fork, knife, and spoon.

“I want to see how many they have to lose before they get new ones,” he says.  And that gives her an idea.  

“Do you want to hide the rest of them?”

“Oh hell yes,” he says, gathering up utensils by the handful.  It’s a shame that they won’t be around long enough to see the guys try and figure out how that knife got in the bottle of vodka in the freezer.

Besides all the gold she has gathered, she keeps an extra spoon for herself.  Just because.

 

  1. A dress, a sweater, jewelry.



Sororities do a better job of keeping things locked down, but they also have better things to take.  Higher risk, higher reward.  It almost makes how much she hates this type of event worth it.  Almost.  

Sloane stares at the closet of locked room she broke into, and feels a little overwhelmed.  Somehow she’s not surprised when Taako appears in a tiny burst of magic.

“So why are you here?”

“Klarg was getting a little intense.  You know how he can be.”

“Are you sure he hasn’t put a tracking device on you?”

“I’m like… seventy percent sure.”

“That’s not as sure as you should be.”

“Yeah, well now that we know why I’m here, what’s your story?”

“Hurley and I are going to an actually nice restaurant for our anniversary, so I’m going clothes shopping.  It seemed like she was my size.”

“That’s convenient.  I’ll miss the makeover montage, though.  I’m really good at the disapproving look part.”  And Sloane would laugh if she wasn’t frustrated by her options.

“Isn’t she supposed to have a little black dress?  Isn’t every woman supposed to have a little black dress instead of a dozen little pastel ones?”

“It’ll be at the back if she doesn’t wear it.”  And he’s right.  There is said little black dress.  With more lace than is actually her style, but something different isn’t always bad.  It’ll definitely look sexy at least.  She takes it off the hanger and does her best to make sure the closet looks like it did before she came in.  Taako is making no such effort as he sorts through a drawer of sweaters.  He holds up one with a skull made out of cabling on it, smiling like he has a secret.  Folding it neatly, he puts it into his bag.

“Okay, so what do you need to match?” he asks and they start to sort through the jewelry box on the dresser.

 

  1. Assorted gold, two rings, a set of bangles.



A slow song comes on, one that sounds more suited for a sex playlist than a dance party and Taako whispers something to Avi, pulling him to the center of the cleared out living room.  Taako is a good dancer.  It’s one of the things about him that makes him attractive until he opens his mouth and starts talking.  (And even then he draws people in again eventually, like a horrible little ouroboros of charm.)  Right now he knows how to move his arms, his hips, and yeah.  This song is definitely meant for sex.

The other people in the room aren’t really dancing, but they _are_ watching.  (Well, not Magnus.  He’s too much of a fucking coward to handle the fact that his friends are sexually attractive and left the room almost immediately.  Magnus rushes _out_.)  They’re watching really intently, and she doesn’t blame them with a show like this.  With Taako dancing and Avi moving against him like he really wants him.  Unfortunately tonight she can’t indulge.  This is the distraction she asked him for, and she’s going to make the most of it. 

Hours later they’re all crammed into a corner booth at an all night diner.  She takes out a set of bangles (gold fill with semiprecious stones) and divides it in two.

“Thank you for your assistance boys, here’s your cut of the take,” she says, handing Taako and Avi the bracelets.

“I swear I feel myself sliding closer and closer to neutral the more time I spend with you guys,” Avi mutters to himself and Taako laughs, resting his head against his shoulder.  He’ll be fine.  The whole alignment system is bullshit anyway.

 

  1. Herbs, crystals, maybe ichor?



“Well… I think it’s about time for me to head out, catch you later.”

“Wait.  Wait.  Magnus and Merle left hours ago.  You’re going back by yourself?”

“That’s the plan.”

“No way!  You can crash at our place tonight.”

“Sloane, I can get back on my own, it’s not like I’m not a competent wizard.”

“I… I know.  I know what it’s like to have to deal with assholes and how shitty it feels even if you could totally take care of them.”

“Yeah it’s… not exactly… fun.”

“Honestly?  It’ll make me feel better too.  And I’ll have someone to help me stop Hurley from punching anyone that catcalls.”

“...Fine, but I’m making breakfast too.”

“See, you say things like that and I’ll definitely never let you go home on your own.”

She finishes shoving potion ingredients into her bag and loops her arm with Taako to start their quest to find Hurley.

 

  1. Five bottles of hard liquor, the best damn (non-sentient) thing in the world.



Taako corners her, looking more serious than she’s used to.

“Steal all the alcohol you can get and meet me outside in twenty minutes.  I’m gonna find find everyone else.”

“Okay, but why?”  Whenever Taako has a plan it’s either beautiful or terrible.  Either way it leaves her both nervous and excited.

“Because this party blows and I have just stolen the best damn thing in the world and I don’t want to get caught.”  And how is she supposed to resist that?

The best damn thing in the world can’t be stolen, because the best damn thing in the world is Hurley.  But Taako is mostly right.  The Pocket Spa is pretty fucking incredible.

 

  1.  Enough gold to pay half a month of rent, a bottle of wine as old as she is.



She had taken advantage of the situation, just knowing there was a distraction but not knowing what it was.  And now even with how well it turned out, she regrets it.  Partially because it would have been awesome to see Kravitz turn into a giant mud monster and fight Klarg and partially because after the mess Taako disappeared for the night.  Whatever his talk with Klarg was, it must have been pretty important.  Important enough to leave Kravitz leaning against a tree, half skeletal, stewing for an hour before he got pissed off enough and just left.  (Real polite, jackass.)

“I mean, shit, Kravitz is pretty lucky that he isn’t mortal, because I think at least five people would have attempted to murder him,” Hurley says when they’re at home, handing her a glass of water because she is perfect.  And she also cares about hydration.

“Even Magnus?”

“Especially Magnus.  I mean, you weren’t there for the elevator makeout incident.”

“What was it Kravitz said then?  ‘You’re so pretty I…’”

“‘You’re so beautiful sometimes I want to rip out your soul and keep it for myself.’”

“Yeah.  That would do it.”

“We had to physically hold Magnus back while the two of them kept kissing.  Avi said it best:  ‘What the fuck, bro.’”

“Avi, the voice of a generation.”

“We were never that bad, were we?”

“No, we always had the decency to have fun in more private places.”

“Like our own home,” Hurley says and kisses her.  Sloane can worry about Taako’s concerning taste in men later.  He’ll be fine.

 

  1. Seventeen packets of sugar, six packets of marmalade, four packets of strawberry jam.



“I’m fine,” he tells her when they go out for tea.  “It’s just…”

“Yeah?”

“No… it’s nothing.”  He shakes his head, like that’ll clear it.  “School stuff, you know?”  He takes three packets of strawberry jam. She takes the rest of it and all the sugar.  He doesn’t make a single comment about the scones being inferior, and Sloane knows something is wrong.

 

  1. A paperweight.



She doesn’t know what to do after he’s checked her into the dorms.  Magnus and Merle are out right now, and that’s good in the long run.  But she could really use a distraction.  Sloane keeps picking things up and putting them down, unsure of what to do with her hands, herself.  Taako looks tired, his angles sharper than usual.  There’s something about him that just seems brittle, about to crack, and it makes her feel sick to her stomach.

“Do you want something to drink?  I’m making some tea.”

“We’re all really worried about you,” she blurts out in a rush.

“Why?  I haven’t been dabbling in any particularly weird magic lately.”

“No, because of Kravitz.”  This makes him stop fiddling with the kettle, and actually turn to look at her.

“Just because my main relationship doesn’t involve peaceful cohabitation everyone is suddenly convinced that I don’t know what I’m getting into.”

“Taako he’s the Grim Reaper I think that makes the situation a little bit more complicated-”

“I can handle it.”

“At least come to the group with me, I think it’ll really help-”

“Oh yeah, that’s just what I need!  To sit around and listen to a bunch of elves feel sorry for themselves!”

“It’s not like that!  You should _know_ .  Holy shit they could use your picture on the fucking fliers.  ‘Have you been reduced to a sex object?  You’re not alone!  Come to Elven Relationship Support Group.’  And then there’s a picture of you and all your poor life choices.  Seriously it’s _that bad_.”

“You know what?  I think this may come as a surprise to everyone but I’m an adult.  I can make my own decisions.  And I choose to sleep with whoever I fucking want and not waste my time on a pointy eared pity party.”

“Fine.  Ruin your own fucking life.  It’s your choice.”

She pockets the starry paperweight as she heads out.  She doesn’t think he’ll care.

 

  1. Nothing.



Sloane tells herself that you can’t steal a person.

 

(She’s not sure that she believes it.)

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'd say that I'm sorry but that would be a lie.
> 
> Also, if you're wondering what Taako and Avi dance to it's the song "Two Weeks" by fka twigs which is INCREDIBLY nsfw. Like really, really nsfw.


End file.
